Friday, January 30, 2015

Rick's songs

I have been writing songs for 45 years. Most of the lyrics were written in a notebook, that is beginning to fall apart. Before they all crumble to dust, I decided to collect them here.

The Gospel of Thomas

There were more than four apostles
That wrote gospels in their day
It seems that Thomas wrote some book
That got in the church's way

So Tommy got labeled gnostic
And got kicked out of the game
Tho' the stories that he wrote for us
Are valid all the same

One day they were hangin' out
And Thomas was at hand
Some apostles were complaining
To the leader of the band

Now Mary, the ex call girl
You've heard so much about
Had given her heart to Jesus
And they were makin' out

Oh, if I was Jesus
You know what I would do
I'd save the world from all it's sins
Wouldn't that be cool
But, after a hard day's savior work
To myself I would attend
And whisper sweet commandments
To my favorite number ten

Pretty girls can't help but sin
The boys make such demands
So I bless 'em and forgive 'em
And they fall into my hands

Don't need fancy wheels or clothes
To get myself a date
Just take them for a quiet stroll
On top of any lake

Yeah, maybe I'm the son of God
But gods need lovin' too
If I'm the, so called, perfect man
Limp wristed just won't do

Magdalena it's OK, if you spend the night
The neighbors won't be throwin' stones
Believe me, it's alright

if I was Jesus
You know what I would do
I'd save the world from all it's sins
Wouldn't that be cool
But, after a hard day's savior work
To myself I would attend
And whisper sweet commandments
To my favorite number ten

The Message to Carla  1982

I decided...can't hide it
Time to let my motives show
I've been staring, so it seems
At the most beautiful woman I've ever seen

From the moment I laid eyes on you
About a year ago
It's come to this, I've lost control
How did you get this hold

Stand by, a message is coming through
Someone thinks these things of you
I can't explain, I don't even try
The sight of you just makes me high

You'd think after all this time
I, at least, would know your name
Well I thought I did, if it really matters
But I wasn't up for playing the game

Could have a jealous boyfriend
With a loaded 38
And just might use it
If you got a date

I stand apart and gaze at you
It makes me feel so grand
One night I chanced to touch your hand
That's when I thought I knew

Flash backs, thoughts keep coming through
Can't stop thinking about you
I can't explain, I don't even try
The sight of you just makes me high

I thought of all the ways I could meet you
But in a bar they all start with a line
There's been so many Don't I know you's
But you are the first to hear this song

And it's not a proposal or a proposition
It simply states my position
I don't care what you do to me
I'll risk it all to say
The understatement of the year
You are attractive to me

Try, try to make the second move
Don't leave everything to me
I can't explai I don't even try
The sight of you just makes me high

Children of the Sun    1982

When the time has come
As told by the sun
All His children lined up behind His back
Save the sea god who roams
And the earth stands alone
Beneath the new moon
Singled out in the heavens to recieve her dues
And a planet that once was covered in darkness
Is given to the children to build again
By His plan
The children of the sun

And everything that was near and dear to me
Might be covered by the sea
My one hope is if I can say
I've got a ticket to ride
Eight miles high and when we touch down
You'll find it'll never be the same again

Continental plates did change their places
And the ancient islands have all returned
Give a listen, if you have the ear
It may not happen but the time is near
My one hope is if I can say
I've got a ticket to ride

Homecoming Prayer   1972 but connects toChildren of the Sun

Stepping off our starship ark
Right back home it was our mark
On isle reborn from the deep
Ocean floor now meets our feet
Now that judgement's come to pass
True advancement will come fast

Now on this isle We get the chance
To make Masters by advance
And join the Maker on It's plane
For wasn't that the Maker's aim

The Hologram    1982

A photograph that is 3D
By it's example has shown to me
The answer to a question near and dear to me
But if you say how can this be
Just hold on and you'll chance to see
The answer is in you and around you and me too

Listen, if you took a knive
And cut a hologram to pieces
Each of it's remaining bits
In laser light releases
The whole, compleat and crimson cast
Object in 3D

And doctors who have had the fate
To be the ones that operate
On brains of the unfortunate
Cut away the broken sections
Patch them up and then revive them
To their suprise they have discovered
When the patien has recovered
He still remembers things they say
Were recorded in the parts they threw away
It seems the brain must be constructed
As a hologram

And if by chance you should go out
On a starry night and look about
You'll see these things I talked about
You're part of everything there is, no doubt
And you could be in touch with it
If only you knew how to
Pass the light through it

Beauty and the Beast    1982

Bearded father sought new ground
Good fortune lay outside his town
Into the heart of the beast's environ
He took the beauty and the story's begun

It came out of a dark corner
From across the room
Sat down there next to them
His eyes began to move
He caught the lady's eyes
And the spell was begining to weave
Before they could get away
He said the lady belongs to me

Somewhere the beast lies hiding
He waits to capture a heart
Shall this be her undoing
Or is there a prince there inside

Captivated, left unsedated
She is free to explore his domain
But back at his castle, bemoaning her hastle
Sits by the mirror and dreams of a prince
Then beauty got away
On some pretention
Went back home seeking a better way

Meanwhile back at the dreaded castle
Through the mirror she sees
Dreams of her prince stop comming
With the dying of the beast
Lying there on the castle stairs
Could be a prince that's under a spell
Will the lady ever know
Or is it too late to tell

Somewhere the beast lies dying
He failed to capture her heart
Shall this be his undoing
Oh where is the prince there inside

After the Cry    1983

When a feeling takes hold
     Don't keep it
Savor it and let go
     Emote it
Never lock it inside
     Can't hide it
Circulate with the tide

Or all too soon
You discover the feelings die
One by one all the lights go out
Drag your soul with a heavy ball and chain
Then again the spirit could fly
After the cry

Something's done you a wrong
     So long to it
Sure and let it be known
     Emote it
Or love's got you in awe
     Lay loo yeah
Celebrate right away

You're meant to be a funnel
The tide of life flows through
But you cannot dam the river
lest damnation be on you
You don't have to store your feelings
There's an unending supply
So go ahead and breathe a sigh
Darling it's allright to cry

Still the One    1982

I thought love would be easy
When the right one came along
But lately I'm uneasy
Guess I was wrong

I felt I had the answers
The secrets to getting along
If I was such a wise man
Why'm I sining this song

Then it comes to me
For love to be
You gotta be you baby
And I gotta be me
And when I look in your eyes
I hope it stays a suprise
You're still the one

I found a love that healed me
From the water into the sun
Still lovers need their spaces
Got to have room to run
Who said love should come easy
Instant flame from a spark in the eye
Even when it doesn't hurt you
Love can make you cry


Quiet Valley    written about the Kerrville Folk Festival

Once I had a dream
Of a place such as I've just seen
There were thousands there
Joined together in the hill country
There to sing their songs

It was peaceful there
I wore my watch but I didn't care
Time is different there
Every moment is an ecstasy
Time ends when you're free

Why can't the world at large
Imitate Quiet Vally
Folks ain't so different
When they sing along
With a heart felt song.

Daddy's a Dreamer    1982 to my three daughters

Once I had a scheme
To be your poppa was my dream
We were younger then
I thought your momma could understand
But she decided I was not her man

I was proud to be
The leader of your family
Sure looked forward to
Enjoying growing up with you
But now that won't be true

Don't cry if you cannot see him
Your daddy's a dreamer
When you're a grown up
I hope you'll understand

That I cannot be a man until I've gone through
All the things that I have dreamed that I must do

So I hope that when you get a little older
You'll come and spend a little time with me
And then your dreamin' daddy will try to help
To make your dreams come true

Things are different now
But things will work out any how
Try and keep in touch
Tho you don't think I love you very much
Thoughts of you give me this rush

And tho we're far away
We'll see each other again some day
You and I will talk
Finding those things we lost
We'll spare no cost

Don't cry if you cannot see him
Your daddy's a dreamer
When you're a grown up
I hope you'll understand

Tho we're distant by a thousand miles of land
When you truly love it need not be at hand

So I hope that when you get a little older
You'll come and spend a little time with me
And then your dreamin' daddy will try to help
To make your dreams come true

Rather be Dancing with you   1982

STOP playing those childhood games
Give me help what's your name
Ain't got time for the same old thing
Anyway what I meant to say
Is come dancing with me

Is there anything I'd rather do
Then be out there moving with you
I'd say I'd rather be dancing with you

WAIT maybe they'll play it again
We could just stand here holding hands
We got us an instant romance
A momentary circumstance
When I'm dancing with you


LOVE wait just a moment for me
I'm not so sure I can see
What's happening to me now
We'll dance a little more
Holding you next to me


December 31st     1981

Side tracking, ease taking
I'm down here taking up time
Slave of the first nutation rate
And don't be late
And I've got somewhere to go
But I really can't remember where
Though it seems I should have gotten there by now

It's like the 31st of December
When the people sing Auld Lang Zine
And I'm tossin' and turnin'
'Cause the thought has crossed my mind
This could be taking too much time

A labyrinth of choice is this life
Passages lead everywhere
But only one comes out
I look through the open doors
The rooms they seem to beckon me
But a covercharge will always cost you time


Fallin' in Love Again

It seems like only yesterday
I didn't know her name
For a sweet time she was mine
And I saw her every day
Call it fate or a fickle mind
But I'm down the road again
But I know what it's like and I'll find it again
And I'll be loving again

Fallin' in love again (3x)
I keep fallin' in love again

Got to have adventure in everything I do
What's the sense of living if you can't learn something new
Each time I do discover it's like love to me
By the time there's nothing left undone
Oh what a lover I'll be
But I'm still


I once lived in the mountains
But I was born by the sea
I've had so many side trips
It comes natural to me
But seems sooner or later
I have to be on my way
But loving you was so much fun
I hope I'll see you some day
When I'm still


End of the Family Tree    1970  about a hippy commune

In greying hour of twilight
When dying day becomes night
I lie in bed on the cold floor
And wish that God would tell me more
On just what the secret is
To living in this world of His
It seems no matter what we do
The lack of progress makes us blue
There are chosen ones who all know
But we can't make our brothers grow

I think I know why Keasey failed
And why his story's now a tale
Now I stop and start to cry
The same thing made Haight Street die
I must stop thinking of the past
Because the future comes so fast
But I thought about this thing today
And now I've just got to say
That I'd give anything of mine
To know we'll make it in my time

Protective Prayer    1971

Comming home late at night
No longer standing straight
Day is done, I'm tired
And it's getting late

I look up at the cross
That's hanging on the wall
Understanding what it means to give all

But the cross can be so heavy
That it's sometimes hard to bear
So I close my eyes and say this little prayer

Jesus and Masters and higher entities
Blow your sweet breath down on me
My sight is clouded by a dark and misty haze
Send your light to show the way

Warm Love    1980   moving from chicago to Texas

Got to be where the weather suits me
Don't like those winter clothes
Want to be near those sunny beaches
With pretty women that like to pose

Sunshine gives me creative urges
For playin' music and lovin' the girls
When it snows the heart she freezes
And warm love gets harder to find

But when it's warm and sunny
The girls they say oooh
Warm love is lookin' to find ya
And you'll be lovin' every one you can

I'll be doing lots of swimming
While I check the action and improve my tan
Those tiny bikinis were made to look at
And I'm not one to buck that plan

I'll be sittin' not thinking about it
Then I see one walking up to me
And I think I know what's on her mind now
It's will he be could he really be
 And when she's looking at me her eyes they say oooh
Warm love is lookin to find ya
And you'll be lovin' everyone you can

Smile     1980

I don't need you to be happy
Pleasure's my choice I have found
Whenever you are around me
The colors seem brighter by far

Everything nice I like about women
Is there to be found in you
When I'm alone
And then for no reason
I smile when I think about you

I do just fine when you're not around me
I've got a life of my own
But life seems so dandy
With your arms around me
I hope that you never let go

I don't stop living
Whenever you leave me
But I just keep hangin' around
'Cause a good life would be better
If I could just see you
I'll call you when you get back in town


Love is a point of view    1979

I was sitting on a hillside
Trying to write this song
All around me stood three pine trees
There to help it along
And all at once I am transported to a beautiful place

Where the sun always shines
And I always like the weather
It's been there a long time
It's the only place that lasts forever

It's not a place or a time
You can hold on to
It's just a point of view
When you go there's no one to take you
And no one to take along
But if you go I'll meet you there
And we'll be everywhere

To get there is the end
To which all means have been devised
But to get there all it takes
Is to see it through it's own eyes
Understanding is knowing
And knowing is loving
And love's just a point of view

And if you choose
Yo see things that way
Here's all you ever have to do
Just give a push
And watch it swing
Then you swing that way too


Candle in a Box    1977

Here is my candle
That's locked inside a box
Wishing to expell
It's golden radiance
Love is outpouring
All there is to give
N'er withholding at all
Total surender to another
The opening of one's astral heart

This candle is bound here
By lack of avenue
Expressions are the roads
Taught us in our past
Nothing ever told me
That I might feel this way
How am I to know
The things to do and say
Who will guide me to you
And who will tell me
That I have the right
To share my light

A sun with no planets
Is but a falling star
For everything that gives
Something must recieve
Light does not exist
Where naught reflects it on
How may I express
That you may reflect
How do I love you
Until I know
Locked inside of me
My light shall be

Minstrel Girl    1970 to the late Kathy Cole

Have you seen the minstrel girl
She's really hard to find
I've been searching twenty years
To try and make her mine

She's sixteen summers to this world
But really not so young
And has a magic music voice
That tells you she's the one

I've looked high and I've looked low
I've looked just everywhere
And suddenly occurs to me
It really can't be fair
That I've been looking much too long
I think I must be blind

So have you seen the minstrel girl
She's really hard to find

Peggy's Song    1973 to Ella's mom

You are a dock for my ship
The cradle of my mind
From a crumbling past
To an uncertain tomorrow

But still 'tis ringing true
On a path with misty views
I shall not venture solitare
I'm walking there, baby with you

You are certainty, reality, my world
You are the world to me

Beckon Me    1969

Ever since I was a young lad
I couldn't make up my mind
And when I stopped to rest a while
I felt I was losing time

Somewhere I knew I'd have to find
The craft that would be my life
And burried in my small universe
The girl that would be my life

But oh no what is that sound
I fear the piper's calling me
And I'm to drown

The Music of the Moon     These lyrics inspired Steve Mark to write a song

Standing on that dock alone
Watching nothing hearing less
Then my eyes were opened
And ears became attuned
To the song you cannot hear in crowds
It's the music of the moon

For many days I've played the game
Stayed straight and I've kept score
These I do must be done
I know but very soon
I've spent myself and must return
To the music of the moon

That's all it takes to get back
A moment now and then
To go outside and look up
The stars can heal your wounds
I guess God made those stars the notes
To the music of the moon

The Last Star    1971 written for Sophia's mom

In the eve of a day that is special
I'm holding you tight
Though the mist will find us in morning
I'm with you tonight

And I know that tomorrow the last star will find us together
'Cause what I've got now I know will last forever
With you

Though the start was liike any other
It's now growing strong
What we gain in loving each other
Will make it last long


While I stand your guide and your teacher
I'm learning myself
So we learn of such loving treasures
From love that is wealth


Cannabinnol    1970

Floating, falling down dowm
Much at ease cannot drown
Smoke enters lungs of red
Races upward to bless a head

Now we are free
In timeless sea
Now we are free
Please let us be

Walls breathe not quite free
In dream worlds without fear
Mind travels through endless space
Take close look at binding place


Sit in circles, pass sacraments
For short moments be heaven sent
Journeying new worlds we now know
Giving restless minds a chance to grow



Canticle I

I've got somewhere to go
   But I don't know where
I try not to be vain
   But still I love my hair

There's so many things for me to learn
And cosmic badges to earn

I know with God that I can find the way
But the people you try to help say it doesn't pay

It's so confusing to me
When will my soul be free

I'd like to go awy
   To some other place
Where my body's light as air
   Like out in outer space
I'd play tag with the meteors
   The whole day long
And then for a change of pace
   I'd drift and sing a song

Sitting all alone    1970

Sitting, thinking, stay up dreaming
Planting love seeds, busy sceaming
While I count the seconds passing
Thought of you continue flashing
If you could sit here next to me
I'm sure in time you'd plainly see
That I've got all I need in life
Except for you to be my wife

But when the light of dawn is clearly shone
I still sit here all alone

Pondering which move to take next
I could I'm sure and write a text
On just what is the proper way
To ask you if you'dlike to stay
But this poor boy still can't find
The magic words to make you mine

And when the light of dawn is clearly shown
I still sit here all alone

To the Tiger

The distance between us
It now seems so far
You are the planets and
I am the stars
You think what we have
Will have to end
But I know I could love you
To the very end
Just put all your doubts
Off to the side
And any small hastles
Will surely slide
We've found such warmth
In the simple things
Wouldn't it be nice to
Continue this thing
Well I love you, I love you,
I love you I do
Please let me know if
You love me too

Last Evening Lament     1969

Saturday afternoon
Good morning, how's your head
If I hadn't done that asprin
My head would feel like lead

What on earth did I do last night
And what new things did I see
And all those things I did it flight
Was it worth it to me
I know I got into your mind
To change your point of view
Well that's just a thing of mine
To teach you to be cool

The music on the radio
Really hit the spot you know
I gues the DJ realized
So he was trying to help us guys

Debbie on My Mind

I woke up this morning
With Debbie on my mind
I felt that I might tell her
But I'm not the telling kind
Then at work I think all day
Of the joy she brings to me
But evening comes I just sit there
I'm tired don't you see

Well I love you but won't tell it
If it's all the same to you
I'll just wink and smile a bit
And sing this song for you

Now sometimes I forget those days
That mean so much to you
But if you had my feeble brain
You might forget them too
So let me set the matter straight
It's not the day that counts
We wouldn't have that day at all
If my love had no amount


You say I don't bring flowers
Perfumes or precious rings
But I can't find any good enough
To set before a queen
It's the thought and not the giving
Or so I've heard them say
So think about this gift to you
I think of you each day


Heart of Joy    Inspired by Sue Glowgowski

Oh what a thing a man he is
A mobile, celestial expression
A thought that does it's own thinking
In it's chosen direction

And the joy that it brings
Will make you sing
With a heart of joy

Oh what a thing a woman is
To make men's minds turn in
To what it takes to be ideal
To be beauty and to feel


And what a thing a child can be
The chord that bonds them all
If it is one with both of us
Then we are one with all


I Have a Friend

I have a friend, I think you'd like him
If you could see him like I do
He holds his head up when he's talking
The kind of man who sees things through

And he doesn't seem too bothered
When his feet get in hot water
He just grabs a bar of soap and takes a bath

He knows all things revolve around him
And likewise he around them
He's the master of his fate for which he's thankful
To the Masters that he serves in return

And everyone that knows him
Says there's a light that's a glowin'
Through him and everything that he touches

I'd like to be more like he is
Doing the things he can do
I'd hold my head up when I'm walking
You'd see my light come shinin' through

And one day wait and see
That man inside of me
Will come and claim his throne like he ought to

I have a friend I think you'd like him
If you could see him like I do

Odds are in your favor

The odds are in your favor
You're gonna get there sooner or later

What you mean, you say to me at first
Well I guess by now you've felt the thirst
That is to say the time will come
When you'll be feeling we all are one

And you'll be wanting to know
   What's going on
Are you getting a message
   Or being put on

And when you come to the fork in the road
Will you take the right path or fail the goal

I wish I could help you sail your boat
But I've got mine to keep afloat
But the odds are in your favor
You're gonna get there sooner or later

The Movie of Your Life    1979

I'd like to see
The movie of your life
It would be complete
With everything you've done
The thoughts that you've had
The battles that you've won
On the road to learning to be one

And when the movie's over
I'll look into your eyes
And there will be love there
Uniting you and I

I'd like to hear
The music of your life
It would be complete
With every song you've sung
The melodies you've rang
The rythms you've swung
On the way to learning to belong

And when the music's over...

I'd like to share
The moments of your life
The times when you're unsure
And clouds are gathered in
Then when you're smiling bright
Knowing that you'll win
When you look inside
And learn that we are one

And when the moment's over...

I'd like to know
The feelings of your life
Your armor opened wide
With nothing locked inside
Expose your greatest joys
Release your deepest fears
As the story unfolds
I'm standing very near

And when the feeling's over...

Incoming Light
It was a restful situation
In the middle of the day
A smoke and peanut butter sandwich
My book before me lay
The book had my attention
That book it ate my lunch
'Cause what the man was trying to say
I didn't have a hunch

Then, suddenly I got it
The Truth had opened wide
I thought to give my eyes a rest
And set that book aside
But when my eyes reopened
It wasn't quite the same
The light was getting brighter
In my direction it came

Incoming light
Brighter than the sun
Incoming light
You and I are one
Incoming light
You called me son

The light kept getting brighter
I could see right through my hand
But the hand was made of the very same light
And now I understand
Then blue sky rolled away
And stars before me lay
But not just little points of light
They're connected in a spiral kind of way

The answer to every question
In this land could be found
But I asked nothing for myself
'Cept how to spread this news around
Then from somewhere up above
A heavenly voice did come
Imagine what it meant to me
When it called me Son

Incoming light
Brighter than the sun
Incoming light
You and I are one
Incoming light
You called me son

Sunday, January 4, 2015

Rick Audette, by the numbers

I am 64 years old and, during this life, have always been connected to large groups and made many friends. I am the second of seven children, have had three marriages and daughters, been a member of two hippy communes, Myspace, Facebook, the Stelle Group, the Keys of Knowledge (Founder), and Secondlife's Sunweaver Community. I have made many friends, perhaps over 1,000. And yet, I think it safe to say, not one of them fully knows me and my many interests. I don't plan on writing an autobiography, but I would like to share a part of me that I have always enjoyed. I have always been good at Mechanics and Spacial Relationships (S.A.T. 99th %ile). This knack has gotten me hired as a Design Engineer in several professions, but to me it's more of a hobby. As a Musician and Craftsman, I've built a number of stringed instruments, including dulcimers and harps. In doing this, I needed to know how to select the right diameter and length to make the strings, but could not find any books on how to do it. I got out my guitar and measured all the strings and frets. Then I spent about a week, using long hand division, to find the number, to 4 decimel places, that would allow me to make a spreadsheet that would automatically give me the diameter and length of sting to make any note needed. I printed it out and laminated it in plastic and still have it.

A few years later, everybody was talking about fractiles, so I got some software to make my own. My favorite was Henon type, strange attractors. As the chaosity factor was tweeked, each printout revealed something that looked like a top-down view of a solar system, with concentric rings or "orbits". Many of the rings were replaced with necklesses of smaller rings or "satelites". The number of satelites per orbit did not seem to follow any predictable pattern, as the factor was advanced .001 at a time and I decided to run the full scale and try to count them, as they bubbled out from the center. The program was run in full screen DOS and I was able to count most of them, but some orbits had so many small ones that they could not be counted. I don't have the same software, but did find the modern equivalent, which runs in a small DOS window. It's even harder to count them now, but I was able to use it to make an animation, to show how the "satelites" form and move out to the edge of the system. I made the following, using only part of the full range, so you can see this action.

The original tally of satelites counted was made into a bar graph, which I have reproduced below. The tallest bar is 41 satelites and the shortest is only 4.

When I finished making the graph, I thought it looked like another graph I had seen before. I dug through my filing cabinet and pulled out "The Great Pyramid's core masonry: graph of course thicknesses", which I have reconstructed below. Each course of stones is a different thickness, ranging from 58" down to 20"

Now, it might not be an exact match, but it does beg the question of just how much math those ancient engineers knew, many thousands of years before we came up with chaos theory. One would think they would make each course a bit smaller, but no, there is a hidden message here. From my studies of pyramids, every dimension hides a message and we have yet to decode them all.

So there you have it, a side of me you probably never saw before.